What this spells for the other candidates remains to be seen, but I can call this already. The Shark Steam Mop has practically won the nomination. Think about it: The Shark Steam Mop created more jobs than the other candidates COMBINED, just from the 90-minute Shark informercials. Also, it seems much more relatable and human than Newt Gingrich.
It has so much experience as a candidate. Its only problem is that it sided with the 1% when it eradicated 99.9% of the germs in your laundry room. If elected, it will even give you five EXTRA steam pads--- ABSOLUTELY FREE!
Gingrich, Romney, and the others might as well just drop out on this one. No one can face off against The Shark Steam Mop in any category, be it cleanliness, user-friendliness, or ability to clean in tight spaces.
And there you have it. The Shark Steam Mop: Savior of the Republican Party.
Bye!
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