Winning Streak

I have just been informed that I have won four free Giants tickets for September third. Yeah, that's right. You see, I am the most incredibly lucky person on the face of the Earth. I entered a raffle at my local library. I read one book, entered my review, and didn't do anything else, and now I'm finding out that I just won four Giants tickets. In fourth grade, I entered one ticket, but won TWO prizes-- 49'ers tickets and kangoo jumps (don't ask). And in poker, I have almost never lost an all-in round (see my previous post, Poker Face). I just happen to be an incredibly awesome person.

I am very lucky, which is more than I can say for the aforementioned SF Giants, who lost yesterday 9-2. EPIC FAIL. We didn't even get to see the infamous beard, BRIAN WILSON, the man made of awesome. My east coast (or Uzbekistani) readers may not know of the beard, so here's a quick overview:

Brian Wilson is the closer for the Giants, and he has 150 saves. He claims to be a certified ninja, who can defeat his opponents with pure thought power. His incredibly dark facial hair has a fan base of its own. It is a beard so dark that staring at it can actually cause severe brain damage. He also has a huge mohawk. FEAR THE BEARD.

He was recently fined because he wore the wrong shoes pitching (or as he put it, having too much awesome on his feet). He doesn't think about pitching while he's on the mound, he thinks about how Cholulah sauce tastes on Pop Chips. He says he's been known to throw Chuck Norris at 100 mph. He is the destroyer of worlds.

So, if you want to move to San Francisco now, I don't blame you. Bye! << The Beard