Revolutionaries III: One Egg is Un Oeuf

Yeah, I'm still doing this, settle down. I'm reporting from 1776 to tell you that the people of the past are F**KING DICKS. Remember those Mexicans I picked up on the way to Philly? They tried to kill me, and they took my time machine. So now I'm stuck, with no awesome Chevy Camaro to take me around. I have, however, stowed away on a French ship leaving New Orleans and heading for New York, so it's all good. Now I need to find a way to get BACK TO THE FUTURE!!! Ah... I love typing those words.

Today's school truth: #5: The internet is the root of all evil. It will distract you using everything it's got. True dat.

The French are nice enough people, but they keep thumbing their noses at me and telling other people that their muskets are inferior to theirs. So at the end of the day, nothing's changed for 237 years. 

The Frenchies here do possess some pretty advanced weaponry, however-- their rifles are capable of being dropped to the ground in surrender in 0.06 seconds.

 

The outer thirds of the French flag can be detached in case of emergency surrendering.

Anyway, it looks like the Mexicans will be taking my car to Mexico City, probably to turn it into a low-rider... I'm so screwed. Or they won't know how to put in the gas and have to push it the last 1,000 miles. So maybe I'll have the last laugh.

I'll be able to write soon about my first visit to New York. Until then, I'll have to duck around the ship, faking a French accent and fighting scurvy.

This was a mistake.

Bye!