The Confeders**t States of America

Remember about a week ago when I wrote a post called Mississippi Unchained, about how that backwards-ass sodsucking hick state just NOW ratified the 13th amendment? Well, the south is at it again. In Shelby County, Alabama, some jackass decided that the Voting Rights Act, which guaranteed  the right to vote for minorities, has no place in the 21st century. His argument? 'Racism is gone.'

Never, ever tell me that there is no racism in America. I will flip f**king s**t. Just be prepared; for I am about to swear more in this one blog post than all of my others combined. So, now that you've been warned, we can begin.

F**K THE SOUTH. Mississippi, Alabama, South Carolina, Arkansas, and DON'T GET ME STARTED ON GODDAMN GEORGIA. These are places where being a fat f**king bastard is 'genetic', but being gay is a 'lifestyle choice.' And sure, maybe there are some people in these states who aren't RACIST HICKS, but they never get to go on TV and dispel the stereotypes that the media has perpetrated about them, do they?

Name a state in the south, and I can tell you some way they've discriminated against minorities. Arkansas was home to The Little Rock Nine, a group of nine black students who integrated Little Rock High School, and who were subsequently threatened with death 24/7. Texas has been organizing gerrymandering tactics for years in order to redistrict the state and disenfranchise minorities. And South Carolina... is... home to that guy who said he was in love with a f**king horse. HOW CAN YOU PEOPLE TOLERATE MAN-HORSE LOVE AND NOT MAN-MAN LOVE??? You f**king people...


One day, when Texas brings up secession for the 10,000th time, we should just LET 'EM GO. And see how long they last before their whole society collapses. Son of a bitch... I'm just done... this is the last straw...

Because, you see, the Voting Rights Act is basically a punishment. We're telling the south "You're a bunch of racist douchebags, and we can't trust you to treat other people equally. So we're going to have to watch you extra-carefully to make sure you don't F**K OUR VOTING SYSTEM UP!!!" It's like babysitting a toddler... who yells racial slurs at people of different ethnicities. You have to make sure that you don't let them out of your sight for just a second, or they'll do some irreversible damage to your house. Or, in this metaphor, your country.

So, anyway... f**k it... I'm done trying to reason with these people. They think that just by the fact that we elected Barack Obama again, racism is dead in America. But by that same virtue, Alabama voted 73% for Mitt Romney, so... how is this argument supposed to work again?

GOOD-F**KING-BYE.