We're Living in Funny Times

Oy vey. I cleaned out The Swamp today, fortunately with minimal casualties. It tried to eat my fingers, but I just barely escaped. It did, however, score a minor victory when it ate my Big Book 'o Crappy Limericks (which I wrote). The Swamp ended up losing about 50 pounds, which will probably lighten the load of my backpack a bit. Right now, it's sitting across the room from me, just staring at me. I don't think I'm gonna get any sleep tonight.

Bad news for Avatar fans: The new issue of MAD Magazine came out today, and NO, the cover is not of Alfred E. Neuman as a Na'vi. That would have been the perfect picture for the cover, seeing as every cover is of Alfred E. as a different thing (i.e, Jack Sparrow, Darth Maul, Gollum, a homeless guy, Batman, Rorschach, etc). Even I had five bucks down on it. Instead, it was just some crap picture of Alfred wearing an 'I love Obama' shirt.

Speaking of MAD, I am incredibly depressed. MAD recently switched to a once-every-three-months basis, and now that I've read the new one cover to cover (three times), I have nothing to look forward to for a whole frickin' three months (besides the end of school- YEAH!) The only thing to think about now is when the monthly issue of Funny Times will come or when The Week will come, well, duh, WEEKLY!

As I was saying earlier, I wrote about fifty limericks in class today, which were unfortunately eaten by The Swamp. Some were about my friends, some about my enemies (I enjoyed writing those most), and some were just random. I've posted some of my favorites on FunnyTimes.com for the Annual Limerick Contest. To see all the 'toons I've done, follow the following link:

All cartoons by me

Now, before you click on that (which I really hope you didn't), I need to explain something to you. Funny Times is an international newspaper that has a website that you can create your own cartoons on (to create your own cartoon, click HERE). However, me and some other Funny Times users have been using it kinda like a social networking site, communicating to each other using cartoons. For my 'toons, I show myself as a geeky social leper with incredibly thick glasses and a bad haircut named 'Elephant Man'. I don't know why I called myself that, but it'll haunt me forever. And for the record, I don't look anything like that. I am a lean, mean, fighting machine.

Anyway, some other 'tooners who also use fake names (such as cta, Ellie May, Eric Per1in, Rick Dickulous, Danger Dan, Sophie, and Yankees With Hope) have been collaborating and creating contests, talking to each other, and having a great time. Here's the premise:

The 'tooners I just listed have mostly been around much longer than me. Here are their 'tooning amounts and when they began:

Me: Sometime in September, 112 pages of cartoons (five cartoons per page).

cta: Longer than anyone can remember, 214 pages of cartoons.

Eric Per1in: Started sometime after cta, but more pages (a result of having too much free time). 233 pages.

Sophie: Since who knows when, Unknown amount of cartoons.

Danger Dan: Since about December, 25 pages of cartoons.

Ellie May: Since about 2008, 64 pages of cartoons. IMPORTANT NOTE: Her husband, aka The Hubster, also appears in some cartoons.

Rick Dickulous: Just started 'tooning about a week ago, five pages of cartoons!

Just Bean: Bean has been around for quite a while, but switched his/her name from 'Queen Bean' to 'Just Bean' a few months ago.

More on the premise: These are the CURRENT 'tooners. Some retired 'tooners include:

CIAgent

Mr. Smartypants

Konrad Schwoerke (who just recently quit)

Claustrophobic (who recently came back! Whoooo!)

Smush (who also recently came back! Whoooo!)

and Ducky.

Even more on the premise: Some idiots under the name 'Anonymous' have been clogging up the website with mindless drivel, such as people standing there saying things like 'poopie'. Anonymous is the automatic name the site gives you if you don't enter a codename into the 'create your own cartoon' page. The 'tooners have united against the Anonymouses, and we have declared all-out war.

WOW, this is a long blog, but Funny Times is complicated. There's also a lot more to tell, like how to create things that aren't on the playground using available elements, and how to write underneath the panels, and how to publish your cartoon and Editor's Picks and cartoon series and bad puns and silliness and how to spot a disguised 'Anonymous' cartoon and...

Oh, what the hell. Just read all my cartoons from back to front. You'll get the picture (kinda).

Bye!

P.S.--- If cta, Sophie, Ellie May, or anyone else is reading this blog, thanks! I need the hits!