That's Paula Deen, magazine owner, chef, and host human to a black oil alien. I don't want to eat anything SHE'S been touching, the alien probably told her to poison it. How do I know? Look at that smile. That is not a natural smile. Eek.
Anyway, I have a thoroughly disgusting story to report: I have recently been tortured to the farthest extent of the word. Here's what happened:
A: I have been coughing for two months. To test for whooping cough, I was given a shot and two long wires were wedged up my nose until they touched my brain. That was the most painful thing that ever happened to me.
B: I apparently need to get braces. Fortunately, my stupid retainer just was popped out. Wheee!!!
I am not going to go into any details, as it may cause some of my reader's intestines to burst. Let's just say I'm ready for school to start.
Bye!
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