2001: A Space Idiocy

Helloooooooooooooooo, people who found this blog after searching the web randomly! As you may have guessed from the title, I watched 2001: A Space Odyssey last night. Oy vey. That thing was more confusing than when McCain picked Palin as his VP. The only part of it that I understood was the 'HAL' storyline, with the whole 'Dave? Dave? I don't think I can do that, Dave.'

Anyway, I'm not even going to try to explain this movie, at risk of causing my readers' heads to explode.

However, moving on: My April Fool's Day pranks went off without a hitch. I stole everything out of my friend's desk, scattering it all over the room (I hid his eraser in the paper towel dispenser). For those of you who think that's too cruel, he had just done the same to me, and I never take a prank laying down. The exploding wasabi, however, didn't work as well. Let's just say I'll be staying after school for the next 5 1/2 years.

And now it's time for...

AN OLD MAN RANT FROM BOB '5-SHOT' SELKOWITZ. The following is not typed or produced by any liberal at G-force nerdworld. The editor and writer of this blog would like to sincerely apologize for the upcoming idiotic Republican rant.

Well, another Easter is here, and you know what that means: Un-pious Democrat bastards will be trying to drop your freshly dyed eggs off the roof of a house. And it's all because of that Kenyan Muslim Socialist Communist Fascist Baby-killing tree-hugging abortion-loving A-1

A-hole BARACK OBAMA. This guy is trying to destroy Easter, along with America, Christmas, Thanksgiving, Independence Day, and your grandmother. But now, people are fighting back, and you can too! Simply complete the following puzzle to find out Obama's evil plot!!!

What is Obama's agenda? Label the following atrocities from one to twenty, in the order that our Kenyan Muslim Socialist president will carry them out!!!

_Marry all gay people in your living room _Shoot a blow-dart at your grandmother's IV bag

_Take away all your guns and cars _Abduct your kids and send them to Al-Qaeda school

_Plaster you with solar panels _Send Joe Biden into your house to bore you to death

_Steal all your three-ply toilet paper _Blow up your nativity scene next Christmas

_Bulldoze your house and turn the lot into a highway for illegal immigrants to come through en route from Mexico to America---- TO STEAL YOUR JOB!!!

_Force-feed you spinach _Use the census information to create an internment camp for pundits

_Change the shape of hot dogs _Disband all churches _Implant a virus in your iPod

_Give Barney Frank a degree in medicine--- HE IS NOW YOUR DOCTOR!!!

_Force all men to have sex-changes, implant a fetus, and abort it _Strangle your pets

_Give all Democrats tax cuts _Declare official war on FOX News

_Demolish Texas and build a 'Monument to Marxism' on the place where Dallas once stood

Thanks!!!

P.S.--- Print this off, fill it out, cut it out, and glue it to your forehead. While it will not protect you from Obama, it will let his agents know you're on to him!