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KOBASSA KADASSA! Sorry, that was random. But as you can see from my title, I am very excited, because I just discovered how to make an incredible array of crazy symbols using just the 'shift' and 'alt option' keys. The apple is made by holding down alt option and shift while hitting 'k', like this:

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Ta-daaah! There are thousands of other useful symbols too, such as ¡, ≠, ∞, ÷, ®, ˚, ™, ¶, •, π, ·, ◊, ¿, -–—, ‰, so on and so forth. And don't think for a MOMENT that I'm going to tell you how to make those. Finding them is part of the fun.

Anyway, spring break is here, and I'm not going to Florida. Therefore, the next nine days will be very boring, with the exception that we will be going to Yosemite National Park. Otherwise, it'll just be me and my friends goofing around and throwing stuff at each other randomly, like those chimps I saw on TV.

Get out of my suit, chimp. This isn't Planet of the Apes.

Another highlight of my vacation will be the monthly cleaning out and maintenance of The Swamp, the mutated, messy, evil, soulless being that inhabits my backpack and is made up of all my past school assignments. For your reading pleasure, I now present to you... THE LIST OF THINGS THE SWAMP HAS EATEN!!!!!

• An orange

• Some weeds I pulled up from the ground

• A milk carton

• Three issues of MAD Magazine

• My homework

• A guy named Kyle

• A plastic Easter egg

• Nearly all my mechanical pencils

• A napkin

• My shoelaces

My teacher told me to clean out the swamp over break or I'd be in at lunch EVERY DAY until I cleaned it out. I hope it's not reading this. Knowing it, if it thinks I'm going to try and kill it, it'll eat me in my sleep. I know it's capable of acts like this. Look at one of its victims.

Bye!