Uppin! Hi, people who stumbled across this blog while surfing the web!!! This blog is gonna be short, so here's my TOPIC OF INTEREST: The Bank Bailouts.
Followers, ever since I started this blog, we here at G-Force have been short on cash. So here's what I want: 7 billion dollars in cold, hard cash from the U.S. government! We're so poor, our college intern Biff has been begging for rattles on the street. (He's only two)!!!
So, I need to announce some sad, sad layoffs here at G-Force_ratings. We have three people who we're chucking into the big, steamy vat of unemployment. The first to go is our feature designer and only zombie employee, Samantha Eatyourbrains. Next, The Joker, our senior image designer. And finally, we're cutting our demographic board down to only two. We're firing Wall-e. I know a lot of you wish we'd fired Jar Jar or Dr. Phil, but since Wall-e had only three fingers and couldn't type, he wasn't really a valuable employee.
Of course, now we need someone to replace them, so we're letting our chief writer, Bob 'Bananas' Roberts take over. He's been such a good sport about it, we're giving him a massive pay cut and a coupon for a free appendectomy. Go Bob!
And now, our new hire. I'm not so sure about this one. We're hiring '5-shot' Bob Selkowitz, an outspoken Republican winger. He's the host of our new feature, 'Why Liberals are destroying America in 25 words or less'. Like I said, I'm not so sure about this one, but we'll see how it works out...
Good news! So far, we've received a grand total of.... $0 OF MONEY FROM THE U.S. GOVERNMENT!!! WHOOOOO!!!!... wait... what was that number again? Zero?
Oh, snap.
Bye!
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